• Diane C

Does a Lack of Confidence Hold You Back?

by Diane Cretin

Are there you things you would like to do, or have at least thought of doing, that you don't do because you lack the confidence to do them? Do you have the mindset that if you cannot guarantee the outcome you are not going to try to do something at all?


I think it is wonderful to give what you do your best effort, but if you don't try things you are not good at how will you ever get better? How will you stretch yourself and discover new joys?


I am a person who likes to plan. Normally I will have done a lot of research and have everything planned out before starting a project. But what I have come to realize is that because I have limited time, if I continually stick to that way of doing things I am going to miss out on a lot. If I am not willing to try something new without being sure of a positive outcome I will miss some wonderful experiences in life.





Take my garden. Normally I would get all of the weeds pulled and new soil amendment added before doing any planting. However, I skipped planting my garden last year and one of my neighbors let their berry vines grow over and under the fence. So this year I cleared out one small area at a time and planted it. I started by cleaning up Olivia's strawberry patch so she could plant it, then moved on to the raised beds for tomatoes.






I had to wait to do our small garden for a few weeks as we found a bird's nest on the ground when I started to clear out the weeds. Unfortunately, after waiting about 2 weeks, we realized that momma bird was not coming back. So I planting our two 4' x 4' beds with squash and cucumbers. It took me a while to clean out the long skinny beds that run along two sides of the big garden because the berry vines were all over, including growing up through the middle of the beds.


Needing to take my time digging out berry vines ended up being a blessing in disguise. It encouraged me to plant little groupings of beans every week or two for about five weeks, which I have never done before. This will give us beans for a much longer time since they won't all be ready at once. I have planted various things in pots as well - peppers, flowers, lettuce, kale, and herbs. And guess what - I still am not finished. This has been going on for three months and I keep planting more things and digging up more berry vines that I cannot seem to get permanently rid of.


This year has been a year of discovery. I planted carrots. We just planted radishes about a month ago since they grow quickly and are really fun for kids. I planted varieties of beans that I have never grown before as well as a squash and cucumber variety that are new to me. I am not sure if we will like them nor do I know what their yield will be like. I even planted some broccoli and romanesque cauliflower later than I should have because I just want to see how they grow; I don't know yet if they are going to make it.


If I had followed a plan for my garden that made it all be neat and tidy before planting, I would not have already harvested cucumbers, various varieties of squash, carrots, basil, lettuce, and our first tomato. I would just be starting to plant now. Quite frankly, sometimes I don't know for sure what I am doing, but I am having a lot of fun doing it.




As a visual learner, I love the beauty of growing things. I take pictures on my phone all the time. I like to watch the play of light on flowers and leaves. It makes the colors stunning.




I even enjoy watching the light on my squash blossoms.




I have become a bee stalker; I absolutely love watching bees and I am thankful they are pollinating my plants.






But here's the thing. I have literally taken hundreds of photos to get these. If I worried about how good of a photographer I am, I would never take any pictures. I know many people are better photographers than I am, including my daughter. I stay happy in the fact that I am taking pictures for my own enjoyment.


Also, if I had to believe that I needed to write perfectly, I would never do a blog post. When Leigh Rodriguez worked in the office, I always admired what a good writer she was. I actually thought to myself, "Leigh should write blog posts." I never intended to write one. If it were not for sheltering in place and looking for things to do with my granddaughter, I probably still would not have done a blog post - because, you know, I doubt that I am a good writer.


I certainly would not have been doing art or making cards as part of blog posts because I have never considered myself to be an artist either. When I was in my twenties, I took a sculpture class at a local Junior College. We studied the human body and were supposed to make a bust out of wood. I was not able to do it. I was not an artist. The teacher was kind and said that as long as I made something from wood, it would count. It could be anything. So I made salad tongs. I still have them, which may not be a good thing as they are a reminder of what I could not do.


Now please click the arrow to listen as I read and show you one of my favorite books, Ish by Peter H. Reynolds.



If you are interested, you can order Ish on Amazon (I could not find it on the website for Copperfield's Books).


I have been learning to live "ishfully" and I hope you will as well.


Continued blessings,

Diane


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