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This time of sheltering in place has been a new and uncharted territory for me. As I mentioned in another post, I like to be "on the go" I actually didn't realize how much I like to be, until I was forced to slow down and stay at home. One evening after everyone in my house had fallen asleep, I was awake feeling all the feelings. Questions and thoughts of the reality of what our world is going through were running through my mind. Fear started to creep in, and the hope that I tend to hold onto was feeling far away. I was scrolling through my social media feed when this video popped up. Christian singer Natalie Grant has been posting nightly songs with her husband playing the piano. I decided to listen for a minute and all of the sudden I had tears streaming down my face, the words to this song really spoke to me.
I try to fit you in the walls inside my mind, I try to keep you safely in between the lines, I try to keep you in the box that I designed, I try to pull you down so we are eye to eye. But when did I forget you've always been the king of the world. I try to take life back right out of the hands of the king of the world. How could I make you so small, when you're the one who holds it all?
I think I listened to the song about 30 times that night, just sitting listening to those words reminding me that I am not in control, I don't have to be in control, because God is. He always has been and always will be, now matter what challenge I face he holds it all in his hands, and I can trust him.